being removed physically from home base provides us with an opportunity for a little perspective.
i am seriously questioning whether jane's decision to undergo treatment for chemo was sound. i feel as if it has taken a tremendous toll on her body - fatigue in addition to the other effects - as well as her general spirits. after surgery in november, she was in a far better place ... feeling as if she had been proactive and gone through something positive (well, we can't say 'uplifting' now, can we?). the chemotherapy has had quite the opposite consequence ... it's been a drag, a downer, a black hole which we all must climb out of now.
it is happening, but what i'm seeing is that it's going to take a long, long time to get through this. and not just the physical ramifications. i find jane forgetful and obstinate, and frankly, i am at a total loss in dealing with this ... i'm frustrated and impatient with the patient myself, further adding to the burden.
when calculating chances, as is the practice, what is the critical tipping point? if physicians infer that there is an 8% chance of recurrence, what does that mean when considering a 4% chance of recurrence? do you put aside your life in the present, to take measures for life in the future?
but we go on, enjoying the sunshine (despite on and off rains yesterday), the palms, the quiet, and our temporary abode for the week. eating light, jogging, swimming, all very therapeutic for the mind and the body, which, as noted above, is most welcome and necessary these days!
i am seriously questioning whether jane's decision to undergo treatment for chemo was sound. i feel as if it has taken a tremendous toll on her body - fatigue in addition to the other effects - as well as her general spirits. after surgery in november, she was in a far better place ... feeling as if she had been proactive and gone through something positive (well, we can't say 'uplifting' now, can we?). the chemotherapy has had quite the opposite consequence ... it's been a drag, a downer, a black hole which we all must climb out of now.
it is happening, but what i'm seeing is that it's going to take a long, long time to get through this. and not just the physical ramifications. i find jane forgetful and obstinate, and frankly, i am at a total loss in dealing with this ... i'm frustrated and impatient with the patient myself, further adding to the burden.
when calculating chances, as is the practice, what is the critical tipping point? if physicians infer that there is an 8% chance of recurrence, what does that mean when considering a 4% chance of recurrence? do you put aside your life in the present, to take measures for life in the future?
but we go on, enjoying the sunshine (despite on and off rains yesterday), the palms, the quiet, and our temporary abode for the week. eating light, jogging, swimming, all very therapeutic for the mind and the body, which, as noted above, is most welcome and necessary these days!
No comments:
Post a Comment