SUCCESS in the CITY

the day has come and gone, and it has been incredibly inspiring and memorable ... the 2008 susan g. komen race for the cure is an amazing success! and in no small part thanks to your love, support, and effort!

although the weather is menacing in the forecasts, it is a gorgeous, sunny 90 degrees in central park today! 28,000 walkers and runners descend to be a part of this incredible community, eager to eradicate breast cancer once and for all - a sea of pink and white t-shirts, worn by men, women, and children of every imaginable background!

our day starts off early, in the ann taylor survivor café, a temporary pavilion set up in the middle of the park. we are greeted enthusiastically by dara richardson-heron MD, the CEO of the organization in new york, and the other key players who organize this event on all of our behalves. most of team jane's journey is on hand at this early hour, as is rabbi adler from our synagogue. special guests include my parents, sarah and arnie, who fly in stealthily without us knowing last night, to surprise our family - fantastic!!!

i am introduced to jayne jamison, the publisher of seventeen magazine, who is receiving the survivor award - congratulations! also on hand are cynthia nixon (sex and the city), deanna favre (wife of NY jets quarterback brett favre), and petra nemcova (supermodel). i am called upon by deanna, and receive a lovely introduction. i am attaching a copy of my preprared statement that i deliver to the crowd on hand (who cheer heartily - both embarrassing and thrilling!).

i am whisked away in a golf cart with deanna immediately following the presentation, to the race start location ... where i am introduced to maurice dubois, the CBS anchor, and am reintroduced to 'judge judy' (who is with at kas and sasha's wedding a few weeks ago!). stephen colbert of the colbert report is also there - funny!!!

finally, the rest of the team catches up with me, and off we go ... unbelievable! the park, the city, taken over by a huge group of people with a common cause!

an update - i am amongst the TOP TEN fundraisers for this event in new york this year - all thanks to you! the total stands at $14,267 - which can go even further as the final date for donations is 31 cctober 2008. the team has raised over $22,000 - making us one of the top teams (but not quite top ten yet - we'll get there!).

in addition to my remarks, I am happy to include a link to our pictures - hope you can visit! check it out by going to:
www.swedlerkomen.shutterfly.com

with much love and appreciation, harley
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from today's presentation:

dear friends:

one year ago, i find myself in rwanda, a volunteer architect designing a village for children orphaned by the 1994 genocide. rather than being filled with dread and despair, it is clear to me that the survivors of that horrific event carry hope, joy, and optimism with them. frantically busy during the day, i return to the comfort of my hotel in the evening, fascinated by the people that soldier on against all odds.

miles away from home, i sit diligently with my laptop, meticulously documenting what i am seeing, experiencing, feeling. strangely, in the heart of east africa, fatigued and perplexed, i find my voice in a daily blog. it evolves into my true and positive snapshot of life flourishing under the most adverse circumstances.

and so it goes with our family’s experience with breast cancer. i cannot possibly project how my first visit to rwanda will prepare me for events to follow. prior to my second scheduled trip, my wife jane is diagnosed. fear and panic set in immediately, and subside just as quickly. as both a physician and a patient, she decisively selects a path to follow. as she sets out to research, discuss, and weigh options for her treatment, i return to my trusty keyboard and starting tapping away. from the first day of jane’s journey, i know that all is not lost, that there is hope.

five days on, living with a new reality, i tell jane that i've started another blog. horrified, she protests vehemently, and despite enjoying my postings from the hills of kigali, she does not, most certainly not, relish the prospect of having her life become an open virtual book. i persevere, promising that post surgery and chemo, we will be able to keep our huge and global network of friends well informed of her progress. at a minimum, it means less phone calls to return. she finally, and wisely, relents.

through daily manifestos ushered out via cyberspace, i draw on the positive energy around us, and relegate negative moments to temporary insanity. as numerous physical indignities are heaped upon jane, i humorously notate the absurdity of the day’s events in trite rhyme, melancholic prose, skippy limericks ... all complimented by a bastion of whacky vignettes.

i humbly stand before you this morning, honored to receive the susan g. komen co-survivor award. i gratefully accept this distinction on behalf of all those who move forward graciously despite tremendous hardships. whether it be halfway around the world, or here in central park, i am thrilled to know that in some small way, my take on a difficult situation has touched, and possibly sustained others.

many thanks, and bravo!

sam sung

okay, firstly, forget everything i said. we are in a race for the race - dollars baby, cold hard cash! oh, if only i were this ruthless in the business world! i have been amazed to see $13,000 come my way in the form of donations to susan g. komen for the cure! and, not only that ... i am part of team jane's journey, which in total has raised over $20,000 to date! not to be overly competitive, but i do happen to be the sixth most successful fundraiser for this event in the new york metro area! i'm on the heels of american express and ann taylor - watch out! by the way, just to make it real - jared reminds me that being sixth is like winning a double bronze (deflation!).

last night, jane and i are invited to a VIP reception at the time warner center at columbus circle. the event is the kick-off for the race for the cure on sunday, and is the start of city in pink (major new york landmarks illuminated in rose colored lights to commemorate awareness about breast cancer). the festivities are held at the samsung space - gorgeous! the room is lit in a star trek fashion, all glowing pink! man, there are a lot of ladies there! skyy vodka, wine flowing, many, many people - all there to pay tribute to those afflicted with breast cancer. the evening is a wonderful success, spirits are high as, despite the bad economy, there are record numbers of people participating on sunday (estimates are 26,000 to 28,000 walkers and runners!). our own team is comprised of 50 people, and based on the tally, you'd never know that there are economic woes! unbelievably, i alone have received gifts from 105 families and friends! bravo!

after cocktails, jane and i are starving, so in my three piece (new) suit [yes, H&M of course)] and her pink dress (tracey feith) we hop over to burger joint at the parker meridien - double patties and an order of fries - deadly, let's hope the clogged arteries don't prevent us from doing our lap in central park!!!

thankful for everyone's support and participation, truly a momentous occasion for us ... we have good reason to celebrate!

(hard to believe it's been seven years since september 11th - so disheartening)

5K is nothing!

forget 5K, or even 10K! team JANE'S JOURNEY, ready for the susan g. komen race for the cure, stands at a remarkable 41 people today. we've raised over $12,000, with many more pledges rolling in. what an amazing tribute to the positive power of jane, and all of the women (and men) who live with breast cancer as a part of their life.

my own personal goal of raising $10,000 by friday (jane's birthday) is GOING TO BE MET! very exciting to see this much energy and passion (at minimum, a great diversion from the political conventions!). let's cross our fingers for a lovely day and a hugely successful event!

we continue to be impressed, inspired, and amazed - thanks to all of you!

to help with the process, please click HERE!

h

cash, cash, cash

if only i were such a tycoon in the business world!

okay, it's all about the race. ten days to go and i'm in good shape - physically and financially speaking! my goal of raising $5K (for the 5K run!) has been met, so i'm going for double - $10,000 to be raised by next sunday, 14 september. please help spread the word! rob a bank! do some insider trading! whatever it takes (i plead the fifth, by the way, when you have your day in court!).

astonishing and amazing, i'm delighted that we are able to assist in bringing about more programs to heighten awareness and treatment of breast cancer. although i usually hate asking for funds (and never actually do it!), this is FUN!

THANKS!

incredible!

not to beat a dead horse, but all of you supporting my fundraising efforts for the susan g. komen race (one week from sunday) are INCREDIBLE!

in the last twenty-four hours, we have raised (drum roll please) $4,000! that's an amazing feat, and i am truly honored by everyone's most sincere generosity.

i'll keep you posted and will be running as fast as my short legs will allow on 14 september!

h

the race is on!

last evening i send out an email with an uncharacteristic appeal for financial support in my efforts to 'run breast cancer out of town'. i am almost immediately overwhelmed with people responding - emails, donations through the susan g. komen website, etc..

i cannot describe how humbling, inspiring, and amazing this is! particularly for someone who HATES to ask for money ... totally not my thing, but i DO feel strongly that this is an excellent opportunity to capitalize on the situation and hand and make a difference.

at this rate, team JANE'S JOURNEY promises to be one of the largest fundraising teams in the new york metropolitan area - quite an achievement. i offer up my most humble and sincere thanks to all for helping us through this past year, and inspiring us as we move ahead!

h

labor day no way

the end of summer is always great. some lament the return to schedules, the school shopping, the college drop offs, the end of beach days.

i prefer to drop everything, and after a very intense summer, it's a welcome relief. the kids return home from camp (and continue to incessantly reminisce about every moment of their collective experience), and once the laundry is sifted through and packed away, it's time to play!

end of august weather is gorgeous - warm and dry (despite periodic katrina-like downpours) so the thought is: leave the beds, leave the kitchen, leave the school stuff, the mail, and most everything else. get outside! the kids tend to be at their loveliest: giddy, happy, free, easy, non-complaining, non-competitive, and up for anything. burgers in the city at 10pm? sure! a walk to kismet on fire island at 6pm? great!

this spontaneous and easy-going nature seems to set the perfect tone. yesterday, we head into our customary breakfast spot. we order, and continue to giggle. the kids are downright delicious, as is the friande and café creme. marlee looks straight at me to let me know that directly behind us, in tiny café gitane, is none other than david schwimmer, 'ross' of friends fame. when i ask her if she'd like to gently go over to introduce herself or request a photo with my newly purchased iphone, she insists that it would be rude to interrupt him. he's eating breakfast with a friend, and i am admonished by marlee for even entertaining such a thought on her behalf. yeahhhh!!! a real new yorker! i'm so proud ...

and why the iphone? yes, it's sleek, and as a long-time apple fan, it seems appropriate. however, i am actually goaded into the purchase after thursday's events. andi and i are guests of friends at a red sox - yankees game - basically, we find ourselves in the best seats at the house that ruth built, practically sitting on the field. A-rod and jeter are within whispering distance (no sign of madonna!). the game is spectacular, the weather gorgeous ... a perfect afternoon. all of the excitement occurs in the bottom of the ninth inning, and we leave en masse with, say, 50,000 other fans. the traffic - horrendous - and even leaving the parking lot is an exercise in patience (and futility!). finally, we are on our way, and i decide it's quicker to weave our way through the local streets of the bronx (never did read 'bonfire of the vanities'!). what do i do? i pull out (what andi characterizes as) a life-size map of the bronx. the three boys (whose cumulative age is still well below my own number of years) stare at me - equal parts disbelief and horror! have i ever heard of something called GPS? the following day, the purchase is made, so now i can make calls from abroad, and leap buildings with a single bound (not to mention actually use the damn thing to help me navigate!).

ahhhhh, summer. labor day, the last licks - ice cream, sand, nothing planned - we'll miss august!

on second thought ...

despite my best and truest efforts at trying to help jane through her ordeal with breast cancer, it seems as if i have been unsuccessful.

not in jane's ultimate and speedy recovery, rather in my approach to going down this path with her. like most men, i am goal oriented - linear in a certain way. cause and effect. do this and that will happen. so i work alongside jane - not so much 'empathizing' with her, but rather 'challenging' her every step of the way. keep the ball rolling ... kids, dinners, café gitane on sundays, thinking about travel, drinks in the city, etc..

i also 'push' jane - taking her shopping to make her feel better about herself, wig expeditions, jewelry outings on sunday mornings. i push her at work too, challenging her to seek new goals, start more meaningful programs, and cut down on unnecessary administrative tasks. i encourage and cajole her - get involved with susan g. komen, talk to the team on my rwandan project about AIDS and unwanted pregnancy prevention.

it is clear to me that i have pushed too much. there is resistance. jane insists now that i have not been supportive to her, that i've driven her crazy. it's a fine line to walk - seeing someone who is in the throws of something difficult ... do you coddle and share, or do you light a fire underneath them? ultimately, i think it's important to pressure that person not to falter, but to rise up and become inspired, to feel good, to look forward, to take their experience and digest it and help others. in this case, jane would probably seek a different path, one of slow and steady 'reemergence' and going through the motions, rather than zipping into action.

we recently hear hoda kotb of NBC speak and she notes how her experience with breast cancer has set something off within her - that she has the courage, drive, and determination to ask for, in fact demand, what she believes is due her. and how she can use her own experience to support and inspire others.

in my own mind, i am conflicted ... as the recipient of a co-survivor honor from a great organization, do i decline this invitation in light of the fact that the person i have been trying to help feels that i have done exactly the opposite - hindered, rather than assisted in the recovery? something to think about ...

i'd like to thank the academy

press release from the team at susan g. komen for the cure:
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for immediate release

jayne jamison, publisher of seventeen magazine, to be honored as “survivor of the year” at 2008 komen nyc race for the cure®

harley swedler, architect, designer, blogger, father, and husband named “co-survivor of the year”

new york - komen greater new york city will be presenting its annual “survivor of the year” and “co-survivor of the year” awards during the survivor program at the 2008 komen new york city race for the cure on sunday, september 14th at 8:00 am in the ann taylor survivor café on survivor lane (south of the 72nd street transverse and west of the bandshell) in central park. honorees are survivor jayne jamison, seventeen publisher and harley swedler, husband and supporter of breast cancer survivor dr. jane swedler. the survivor award will be presented by cynthia nixon - race grand marshal, komen ambassador, breast cancer survivor and star of sex & the city: the movie. jill eikenberry and michael tucker, stars of “l.a. law” and off-broadway's new musical “enter laughing”, will present the co-survivor award.

“everyone has been touched by breast cancer - whether personally or through the illness of a family member, friend or colleague. the disease simply knows no boundaries,” said dara p. richardson-heron, MD, komen greater nyc ceo. “as an 11-year breast cancer survivor and daughter of a 20-year breast cancer survivor, i am pleased about our komen greater nyc tradition of honoring a survivor and co-survivor. i am confident that their moving experiences will touch and inspire others.”

jayne jamison has been vice president/publisher of seventeen since 2003. the magazine is #1 on the newsstand and has the largest total audience circulation in its category. prior to seventeen, she was vice president/publisher of redbook. during her tenure, the magazine showed tremendous growth.

jayne, a divorced mother of two, learned she had breast cancer the day the invitations arrived for her wedding to husband edward j. bisno. their story, chronicled in the “vows” column of the new york times, is one of love and hope. the couple decided to proceed with their wedding even as jayne was being treated for the disease.

jayne had surgery and chemotherapy - shaving her head rather than waiting for her hair to fall out - while working at seventeen and planning the wedding.

determined to be a beautiful bride, jayne bought a wig and was professionally made up by a boston makeup artist. in front of 80 guests, the rabbi spoke of their ordeal saying, "there are flames that can bring beauty to even the darkest days. the flames of hope and kindness and love."

today, jayne is happily married and cancer-free. seventeen magazine has been a sponsor of komen greater nyc's teens for the cure event, tickled pink! since its inception in 2005. this past year, jayne and her daughter appeared as models in the fashion show that closes the annual event.

her story is an inspiration to those who suffer with the disease and those who love them.

harley swedler is an architect, designer, blogger and husband of physician jane swedler, who was diagnosed with breast cancer in november 2007.

as a blogger, harley swedler decided the best way to create a semblance of normalcy for his wife, three children and himself after jane was diagnosed with breast cancer was to use the blog to reach out to others. the blog served as a great tool for helping the entire family and close friends stay informed of jane's progress. it also helped everyone work through the emotional process of dealing with jane's diagnosis. it also was a good way to ask for assistance when needed...

harley blogged daily. at first, the entries were pensive and serious. but soon, they became somewhat cheeky and irreverent and included sardonic poetry, absurd limericks and ruminations about how the disease did and did not take over their lives. the blog had a tremendous following, so the family wrote postings so that friends and family could respond. each included a photo - of jane looking ravishing or the kids trying on her wigs - or something off topic about what the swedlers were thinking.

jane swedler elected for prompt and definitive action after her diagnosis, immediately having a double mastectomy, quickly followed by chemotherapy. she has “…fully recovered and then some, without missing a beat,” according to her husband.

harley also volunteers with the american jewish joint distribution committee (JDC), a non-governmental organization. he was in rwanda (with his wife's blessings) on a JDC project two weeks after jane had her surgery. at a JDC conference this spring, he met hala moddelmog, ceo of komen national. as a result, both swedlers have decided to get involved with komen.

as a co-survivor, harley wants to reach out to other men, to help them deal with the disease and its effect on families. he also hopes that the swedlers' offbeat family approach will serve as a model to other families dealing with the challenges of breast cancer.

stars of stage, screen and television will shine for the 2008 komen nyc race for the cure®, which will take place sunday, september 14, 2008 at 9:20 am in central park. breast cancer survivor, komen ambassador and emmy and tony award-winning actress cynthia nixon will serve as race grand marshal. stephen colbert, host of comedy central's the colbert report, and his family will fire off one of the race's three starting guns and tv's own judge judy sheindlin will fire another. broadway and recording star maureen mcgovern will sing the national anthem before the start of the race while supermodel petra nemcova will be on hand to represent ann taylor during the survivor program in the ann taylor survivor café in central park. finally, emmy rossum, christine in the movie version of phantom of the opera and now of komen's new pinkitude program, will appear.

decisions, decisions

as we move further and further away from jane's initial diagnosis in the fall of last year, and the ensuing treatments which have restored her good health (and wreaked havoc on our collective mental health!), we gain new perspective.

sometimes, resolve comes in the form of fortitude - battle against 'the enemy' (disease in this case). and sometimes, we endure events in life, either good or bad, which make us take stock of what's around us - what is worthy, and what is not.

and then, the most profound changes of all can come with no thought or consciousness whatsoever. that is most definitely what i am going through now, and in fact, have been going through since april - unwittingly! it has come to my attention, just as a good bout of family harmony often does, that things have changes, at least for me. i can see clearly. there are very few 'gray' areas.

i'm sure that this is directly attributable to the events of the past few months ... decisions seem to be yes or no, this or that, now or later. there is no (never-ending) series of options, as there is not future time to act. the moment is now. the choice is A or B. and nothing seems muddled or murky. it's all clear, and what's even more exciting is, it's all easy.

this seems like a paradox to me, particularly after all of the ruminations i've gone through on the uncertainties of life, old age, chance and happenstance, etc.. after ALL that, to get to a point, with no effort, that affords me clarity in taking action ... well, frankly, it's a gift!

so another day, another series of things to ponder, discuss, deliberate - and here i am. lucky i don't have to pick a running mate too!

boxed lunch

oh my! where has the time gone!?

jared, marlee, and andi have returned from canada (accompanied by copious amounts of laundry - uggghhhh!). they are gorgeous and vibrant, and still mildly to acutely insane, which is to say that we love having them back. despite boiling water for rotini with pesto, hand grating vast amounts of reggiano cheese, thinly slicing fresh mozzarella, baking cakes, clanking dishes, making beds, with a small dose of nagging!

they walk into our bedroom, to find that we have added a couple of pieces of furniture for organization - and they recoil in shock, utter shock, when they see that our closets have not only been cleaned but are seemingly miraculously organized! looking like a poliform print ad!

well, in truth, this summer i have whipped the house into shape. and i realize that, beyond the necessary solstice sweep, there is something deeper happening. truly a need for 'control', mastery over the chaos that has reigned since jane's diagnosis. i methodically get to every corner of the house - eradicating all signs of disarray, creating 'systems', cleaning. our home is (however temporary) a living testament to martha stewart - books aligned by color and size, laundry folded as if it were on display at the gap, papers arranged, cupboards refreshed.

and no more so than in our own cocoon - our bedroom. everything is stowed away in neat boxes, bringing both a sense of uniformity (to the space and to our minds) whilst compartmentalizing each and every article of clothing or object. and i don't really need to make a stretch here ... it is our own response to what's happened. everything 'digested', organized, boxed, shelved, put away.

i suppose that's exactly how we think about, feel about jane's brush with breast cancer ... having passed through this 'experience', it's time to package it up and store it away. it's still (and will continue to be) a big part of our lives, but it's no longer there, front and center - we can see the forest through the trees!